Let’s move into a time of drivel
A delightful charismatic liturgy posted by Steven Harris is well worth a look. (HT Jim West): Here’s a taster:
Candidate: I’m suffering from male pattern baldness and I want to be healed.
Leader: Let us pray: Lord, we declare that you are a God of growth and restoration, Lord. And Lord, we stand on the truth of your word and declare that every hair on our head is numbered, and that Lord, you want to see INCREASE* and OVERFLOW*! Lord, cover up this shameful nakedness.
Yes, I know this is an exaggeration, but OTOH, it comes painfully close to some real-life experiences. While on the subject, note this cartoon from ASBO Jesus.
And a real life story. Someone I used to know well, who was deeply involved in promoting the charismatic movement in mainstream churches in the UK, told me this about his own experience. He was not a person who exaggerated, so incredible as this is, I believe him.
He was at a large charismatic rally in London, and the meeting arrived after lengthy praise at a “time of ministry”. The speaker said that God had told him there were many many in the audience who were under particular attack at this time from a “spirit of masturbation”. He then announced that they were going to be set free from this particular form of demonic oppression. he said that stewards were coming round the audience with tissues, and all the men who wanted to be set free from the spirit of masturbation needed to take one.
I pause, while you all wonder what’s coming next (Ed — possibly an unfortunate turn of phrase there.)
Fortunately for everyone, no doubt, it transpired this this particular spirit needed to be coughed out into the tissue. No other action was required while the speaker prayed for them.
While no branch of Christianity is without its particular idiocies, it does seem to me that charismatic fervour more than most can quickly turn into some very strange behaviour, as people confuse being a fool for Christ with being a spiritual idiot.
But enough of that, you wonderful praising pentecostals: hands down for coffee.
January 8th, 2008 at 7:51 pm
As a Charismatic-Pentecostal I can attest to the truthfulness of such experiences. You might find this post of mine of some interest, expecially the first paragraph.
January 8th, 2008 at 8:05 pm
“Candidate: I’m suffering from male pattern baldness and I want to be healed.
Leader: Let us pray: Lord, we declare that you are a God of growth and restoration, Lord. And Lord, we stand on the truth of your word and declare that every hair on our head is numbered, and that Lord, you want to see INCREASE* and OVERFLOW*! Lord, cover up this shameful nakedness.”
genius! wish i’d come up with this gag! brilliant!
wow!.. your friends story… i mean, blimey! i mean… words fail me.